Underwhelmed?

This post had to be written. The voices in my head are becoming deafening. Love life, career, religion, family, finances, friends, foes, office politics, fake friends, wannabes, future, property, business, investments - my word, there are a lot topics floating around in my head. Love life-sucks as usual - unhappiness, bitterness, anger, oblivious, resignation. Why do two people who have no idea of what to do with a relationship stay together?....Bad idea? or Blind faith? Religion continues to be as mind boggling as ever. Do this, no don't do it...do that, no that's bad, that's good...Family-seems alright...Friends? Do I have any?Foes-I am indifferent to them, office politics-STUPID!Wannabes-shut your trap till you prove you have what it takes, Future?????property-none as yet, business-I'm brainstorming on a couple of ideas but none of the quick rich types, finances-very very low and investments-boy I hope they are making money, else I am just one of those suckers who think they can beat the poverty trap through sophisticated financial solutions. Who ever thought of calling them solutions anyways....Genius...coz he lied to so many but made them believe.Career.

I'm looking around for options. Besides the fact that everytime I step into the office I feel like killing myself and shouting at the gaffer for being an ignorant brat, I have come to face the fact that there is no way in hell or heaven, can I last a couple more months with someone who lacks humility, who potrays an image of self-righteousness, who is loud in an attention seeking sort of way and whose subordinates are beginning to see that he/she might not be all that. I think if that feeling is some clue of what I should be doing I bloody well should heed my own advice.

Who the fuck cares

Its hard to put in words emotions that you feel at certain points in your life. You know its happening to you because you feel it. But you just can't describe it. This is not one of those times.I FEEL FUCKING DEAD. My entire consciousness and sub-consciousness feels dead. I think I'm overwhelmed by the thoughts in my head that just refuses to dissapear....Can it be that in a relationship one feels overwhelmed by the other? Well.. that question sums up my whole attitude of the woman in front of me. While she blabbers on about her life and its ongoings, the only thought that registers in my head is WHO THE FUCK CARES?...but at the same time I'm thinking, I shouldn't really care coz its not my life. So why is it that its important to me that she takes notice of my opinions?...I dismiss it..like I said before WHO THE FUCK CARES?Is it strange that you would like someone but at the same time feel as though you don't at certain points of your relationship?

Anyways, enough about relationships.On the topic of my career, I am SERIOUSLY GETTING FUCKING BORED. I gotta get out.. i gotta get out.. i gotta get out...i gotta get out. Everyday in the office doing the same ole data entry bullshit is sucking my life away. i gotta get out. I don't really care for much about trying to achieve efficiency, service-orientedness blah blah blah bullshit blah blah blah blah and blah....ok maybe I do. But the point is I AM FUCKING BORED. Come'on man, throw me a lifeline here. I need to do something more than just babysitting people. I mean, I ain't from the Babysitter club. I'm in this to learn more about the business. I AM FUCKING BORED coz while the boss goes galavanting doing this and doing that, I'm stuck at home babysitting. FUCK THAT. Man, if i didn't need the money badly, I would definitely quit by now. FUCK FUCK FUCK. FUCK life and its obligations. I hope i didn't miss the boat.

Ok dudes who are reading this (only one I can think of) if you know of any opportunities where I might be able to get out of this hell hole, give me a shout. I definitely do not want to be stuck in this twilight zone of a place. I missed the boat once....never again.